Eventually I'm going to get a little better at being more regular with this. We moved into an apartment last weekend and then we have been working non stop to make it feel like a home. At least for a little while while we are here. Its pretty weird starting a new chapter of our life and not having our little man here with us. We are trying to adjust to the feeling of someone missing. It is a constant companion of ours. The Lord has really worked everything out for us this week. We closed on our house Friday. We are no longer the owners of our Tanglewood home. That was harder than I had imagined it would be also. We found out we were pregnant with him there and we were so excited for him to come and got his room all ready. That was where our lives changed forever and while there are so many memories there that are dark and awful, there are sweet ones there as well. It showed us , though, that those memories will always be a part of us. We are forever changed and wouldn't want to be the same. We got to see the baby again on Friday too. We had another ultrasound for my peace of mind. Everything is going very smoothly. It has been a week of remembering and looking back. We are learning how to look at the past without staying there. We are learning to look to the future, but our hopes are so different. We have new expectancies and new dreams for our family. I have been listening to a song a lot lately by Sara Groves. It says: All I have need of, His hand will provide. He's always een faithful to me. I can't remember a trial or a pain He did not recycle to bring me gain. I can't remember a single regret in serving God only, and trusting His plan. He's Always been faithful to me. .... God has been faithful, He will be again. His loving compassion, it knows to end. All I have need of, His hand will provide. He's always been faithful to me.
He is definitely holding us closer than ever before, but I think its because we are letting Him... He loves us so very much and I will never doubt it again. He will always walk beside us!! I have never loved Him more! We know that we will always miss our Jace. He is a part of our family that is missing until we are reunited with him. We also know that God is good. He has been faithful, and He will be again!!
2 months ago